Autumn-Artist93

Truth be told, it's been such a long time since I logged in that I actually forgot my password and how I spelled my username. I tremendously fail at life, Imma go hide under a rock now...I graciously thank you for being so patient with me. I promise to keep in touch more than once every half a year! 

I swear, I hated this semester so much that if I had a dollar for every time I thought about dropping out, I wouldn't have to work about my student loans. It single handedly almost killed my passion in photography. I even shot my midterm project around my passion being burnt out. My instructor for my printing class gave some wonderful advice. He told me, "Don't follow your passion. Because your passion could very well burn out and you will grow to hate the passion that you once loved so dearly. Instead, follow your curiosity. Your curiosity will lead you to places you never could have dreamed of. And it will drive you to make discoveries that could very well change your life and possibly even the world." This is one of the best things I have ever had someone tell me directly. I wish I had heard this when I was 18. I don't know if I would have chosen a different field to study, because I wholeheartedly believe that is what God has called me to do. But I may have taken another path to go and pursue it. I still love photography, and I was so afraid that my burning passion was going to die out. I don't ever want to go back to that point where my burning passion had gotten to where it was just a smoldering ember.

But, I now have a new passion in my life. I have a passion for medicine, a passion for helping people. I always had a passion for helping people. My mother wanted me to be a nurse, but I refused it. I couldn't fathom seeing sickness and death day in and day out. I couldn't stand the thought of causing someone pain, even if it was supposed to help them. I follow a bunch of kids with cancer on Facebook, and it breaks my heart! I have heard of so many children die in hospitals from cancer and other diseases, seeing families torn apart by unfathomable grief. There is this one little girl named Carolyn, though she survived her cancer, the treatments almost took her life. She was just 4 at the time and had to take 9 months of chemo. Her parents posted videos of her while they had to access her port to give her the poison that would, or "should, save her life. She was kicking and screaming as the nurses held her down to stuck a fishhook of a needle into her chest. Her father had to hold her down in his arms while she was screaming, "Stop Daddy! It hurts, it hurts! Make them stop!" I don't know how those nurses done what they had to do without breaking down and crying. I couldn't put myself in that situation. It takes a much stronger person that I to see that day after day. Instead, I want to take my license and work in pharmacy of a hospital somewhere. I'm not causing precious souls any pain while I am actually helping them get better. And I will be am far from the glances of death and despair. Working in the pharmacy that I work at now is a tough job already, and it'll be even harder when I work in a hospital environment. But it is a necessary one. 
FUN FACT: My grandmother works at that same pharmacy that I work at and has been doing so for 60 years! We get to work together every other Monday and every Thursday! 

That's so awesome about the new position! Congratulations!!! That sounds so fun and exciting I'm so happy for you!!! I'm sure it will lead you to a great, bright future . I wish you the absolute best!

HAHAHA Sell-A-Door! That's so funny XD XD XD!!!!! If you say it fast with a accent, it does sound very exquisite. I wish the English language had beautiful sounding phrases for things like French and Italian do! 
-What is that sort of fancy contraption is that my dear lady? (points to the wall)
-Ah! That my old friend is what the Italians call a 'Porta Della Cantina'. Or as it is called in our native tongue, a cellar door. 

I swear I want to learn Italian or give another swing at French just so that I can say those fancy sounding phrases at any given moment. I tried to learn French and it was an utter failure. Françai es un punta!

I'm taking a break from photography for a little bit. I want to photograph things that I actually like and not just to get a grade on it. I need to get a breath of fresh air. I need to kick back and not be so "stiff and professional" in my approach and shoot things that make me happy. I have one of those little Instax Mini 8 cameras coming in by Fujifilm. It's like a polariod that shoots out the film. I think that will be a great way for me to unwind and help me capture "the smaller things in life". I feels more productive having a finished product in your hand than something you have to tinker with on a computer. And I won't have to lug my equipment with me

I really like and appreciate how you asked about tea Sadly, I have not been drinking as much as I have lately. I just haven't taken the time for me. PERPETUAL SHAME ON ME!!!!! But when I do have my tea, I take immense pleasure in it. I savor it more. I'm fixing to have some right now!